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Photo Post Sun, May. 20, 2012 3 notes

Philipp The Magnanimous, Landgrave of Hessen
(or The Story of the Prince with Three Balls)

Courtesans, mistresses and lovers were common “family members” that any nobleman could have on the side, in secret or flaunt in public – even for Catholic Bishops and Abbot Princes. But marry? Out of the question! Charlemagne had forbidden bigamy ever since the Holy Roman Empire was founded. Bigamy was not only scandalous, sinful and kinky; it was punishable by death.

Naturally Philipp could have obtained a divorce from Christine of Saxony, if he wanted to.  If a noble wife could bare no children, or was not healthy, noblemen could petition the Pope for a marriage annulment (a de-facto divorce). However, Philipp could not afford to affront his most powerful friend and ally, the Duke of Saxony, by sending the poor man’s daughter back to her father in disgrace. Besides, Philipp would have been hard-pressed for legitimate excuses to divorce her. By that time, he had already sired children by Christine, so he couldn’t very argue she was unable to bare.

Still, he wanted an official “Morgantic marriage” to Margarethe von der Saale. A Morgantic marriage is having official permission to have a Prince William / Kate Middleton type of marriage, where the groom is of noble birth, and the bride has lower noble status than groom. But even if the church/emperor would have approved of Philipp marrying his Cinderella, they would never have tolerated bigamy.

Time for some political creativity. An natural-born ruler like Philipp had the skills it took to find ingenious ways to bend the rules to suit his purposes wasn’t about to let some silly church ethic dash his plans. There are no written records how he did it, but Philipp convinced his wife, Christine, to give him written consent allowing him to have another wife. Even though Christine had few rights, Philipp could have never married Margarethe without her express permission. After that, it was a simple matter to convince his Protestant clergy friends to allow him to use Old Testament references to consent to conducting a church wedding. Luther testified that in Philipp’s confession, he learned that Philipp “possessed extraordinary physical endowments” (e.g. he confessed to having three testicles) and thus he required two wives “to quench his natural God-blessed manly desires of the flesh”. 

Of course, the whole wedding, in Rotenburg an der Fulda in 1540, was a dirty little family secret, because if word ever got out to Charles V, the Emperor would have no choice but to put him on trial and punish him for bigamy. Not only that – the pious peasant community would have condemned Protestantism in its infancy as heretical “Sodom & Gomorrah”. 

Read the rest of the blog here.

Philipp The Magnanimous, Landgrave of Hessen
(or The Story of the Prince with Three Balls)

Courtesans, mistresses and lovers were common “family members” that any nobleman could have on the side, in secret or flaunt in public – even for Catholic Bishops and Abbot Princes. But marry? Out of the question! Charlemagne had forbidden bigamy ever since the Holy Roman Empire was founded. Bigamy was not only scandalous, sinful and kinky; it was punishable by death.

Naturally Philipp could have obtained a divorce from Christine of Saxony, if he wanted to. If a noble wife could bare no children, or was not healthy, noblemen could petition the Pope for a marriage annulment (a de-facto divorce). However, Philipp could not afford to affront his most powerful friend and ally, the Duke of Saxony, by sending the poor man’s daughter back to her father in disgrace. Besides, Philipp would have been hard-pressed for legitimate excuses to divorce her. By that time, he had already sired children by Christine, so he couldn’t very argue she was unable to bare.

Still, he wanted an official “Morgantic marriage” to Margarethe von der Saale. A Morgantic marriage is having official permission to have a Prince William / Kate Middleton type of marriage, where the groom is of noble birth, and the bride has lower noble status than groom. But even if the church/emperor would have approved of Philipp marrying his Cinderella, they would never have tolerated bigamy.

Time for some political creativity. An natural-born ruler like Philipp had the skills it took to find ingenious ways to bend the rules to suit his purposes wasn’t about to let some silly church ethic dash his plans. There are no written records how he did it, but Philipp convinced his wife, Christine, to give him written consent allowing him to have another wife. Even though Christine had few rights, Philipp could have never married Margarethe without her express permission. After that, it was a simple matter to convince his Protestant clergy friends to allow him to use Old Testament references to consent to conducting a church wedding. Luther testified that in Philipp’s confession, he learned that Philipp “possessed extraordinary physical endowments” (e.g. he confessed to having three testicles) and thus he required two wives “to quench his natural God-blessed manly desires of the flesh”.

Of course, the whole wedding, in Rotenburg an der Fulda in 1540, was a dirty little family secret, because if word ever got out to Charles V, the Emperor would have no choice but to put him on trial and punish him for bigamy. Not only that – the pious peasant community would have condemned Protestantism in its infancy as heretical “Sodom & Gomorrah”.

Read the rest of the blog here.




Photo Post Thu, Mar. 08, 2012 2 notes

19th century bread backing house in Central Germany

19th century bread backing house in Central Germany






Photo Post Thu, Mar. 08, 2012 5 notes

Death on Kara marble in the Cathedral of Fulda.

Death on Kara marble in the Cathedral of Fulda.








The Almost True Tale of Jane’s Scar Face

Jane turned and twisted in front of the full-length mirror, scrutinizing her rear end.

“Shit!” she hissed. “Shit! Shit! Shit! And Goddamit!”

The slinky synthetic fabric of her super-sexy red cocktail dress had hitched up in bunches on top of her apple-shaped posterior. The material crackled static electricity as she grabbed the back part of the dress skirt and pulled it down, only to see it snuggle back up to its former position. She exploded in frustration. Like a drowning woman fighting her way to the surface, she struggled to rid herself of the stupid dress. Jane knew that dress wouldn’t work without a slip but the goddam slip made her butt look fat.

Time for Plan B.

Plan B was the super-sexy classic black cocktail dress that didn’t need a slip AND didn’t make her butt look fat. Thank God black was one of those colors people rarely look at and say, “Look! Jane’s wearing the same dress as last time!” Besides, Geoffrey had never seen her in this super-sexy dress. On went the dress, and to her relief no bunching. Butt looked okay… and… she adjusted her breasts… décolleté looked fantastic. Everything looked great, except for that stupid scar. Great! What was she going to tell Geoffrey?

Jane hadn’t seen Geoffrey Barnes since she was in college. He was this really cute guy on a student exchange year from England, and when she said “really cute”, it didn’t do him justice; he was more like “Prince William awesome cute”. And his accent! OMG! Just thinking about it made her jittery.

The rest of the story is here.

The Almost True Tale of Jane’s Scar Face

Jane turned and twisted in front of the full-length mirror, scrutinizing her rear end.

“Shit!” she hissed. “Shit! Shit! Shit! And Goddamit!”

The slinky synthetic fabric of her super-sexy red cocktail dress had hitched up in bunches on top of her apple-shaped posterior. The material crackled static electricity as she grabbed the back part of the dress skirt and pulled it down, only to see it snuggle back up to its former position. She exploded in frustration. Like a drowning woman fighting her way to the surface, she struggled to rid herself of the stupid dress. Jane knew that dress wouldn’t work without a slip but the goddam slip made her butt look fat.

Time for Plan B.

Plan B was the super-sexy classic black cocktail dress that didn’t need a slip AND didn’t make her butt look fat. Thank God black was one of those colors people rarely look at and say, “Look! Jane’s wearing the same dress as last time!” Besides, Geoffrey had never seen her in this super-sexy dress. On went the dress, and to her relief no bunching. Butt looked okay… and… she adjusted her breasts… décolleté looked fantastic. Everything looked great, except for that stupid scar. Great! What was she going to tell Geoffrey?

Jane hadn’t seen Geoffrey Barnes since she was in college. He was this really cute guy on a student exchange year from England, and when she said “really cute”, it didn’t do him justice; he was more like “Prince William awesome cute”. And his accent! OMG! Just thinking about it made her jittery.

The rest of the story is here.




Photo Post Thu, Mar. 01, 2012 4 notes

Burning Times in Germany 

Today I read a couple of blogs, namely this one and this one, which sort of irked me the way one of them expressed, “There were no burning times”. One of the persons, who wrote these blogs, claims to be a former school teacher. I can only hope she doesn’t teach history, because the “Burning Times” were, indeed, a sad fact of German history all the way to the end of the  17th century. In fact the last case of a witchcraft/demon possession in Germany was in 1974 (No, I did not switch the 9 and the 7).

These neo-pagan blog authors seem to be discounting witch hunting in Europe and North America by claiming “Yes, some women were accused of Witchcraft and burned at the stake, some were stoned or even drowned. But they were not usually witches”.

Excuse me?

They were not witches? By whose standards? By the standards of neo-pagan witches of modern-day society? Perhaps their definition of what makes a witch is completely different from late medieval and early modern standards. At any rate, some neo-pagans seem to believe they can deem who was really or not really a witch, based on their modern frame of reference, while bathing in the luxury of living in the climax point along the timeline of religious tolerance.   

To begin with, I’ll give you a small ex-course in the history what constituted a witch.

Burning Times in Germany

Today I read a couple of blogs, namely this one and this one, which sort of irked me the way one of them expressed, “There were no burning times”. One of the persons, who wrote these blogs, claims to be a former school teacher. I can only hope she doesn’t teach history, because the “Burning Times” were, indeed, a sad fact of German history all the way to the end of the 17th century. In fact the last case of a witchcraft/demon possession in Germany was in 1974 (No, I did not switch the 9 and the 7).

These neo-pagan blog authors seem to be discounting witch hunting in Europe and North America by claiming “Yes, some women were accused of Witchcraft and burned at the stake, some were stoned or even drowned. But they were not usually witches”.

Excuse me?

They were not witches? By whose standards? By the standards of neo-pagan witches of modern-day society? Perhaps their definition of what makes a witch is completely different from late medieval and early modern standards. At any rate, some neo-pagans seem to believe they can deem who was really or not really a witch, based on their modern frame of reference, while bathing in the luxury of living in the climax point along the timeline of religious tolerance.

To begin with, I’ll give you a small ex-course in the history what constituted a witch.



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